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Police officer communication during motor vehicle stops, including tone of voice and level of respect, shapes public perceptions of, and trust in, the police. In this paper we investigate how community members and police conceive of good communication during traffic stops and assess whether these views vary across civilians of different backgrounds and between civilians and police. Empirically, we draw on in-depth interviews with police officers and community members, a large-N survey of Los Angeles residents, and a review of police training materials. We find significant differences between members of the community and police in what they believe constitutes good/appropriate communication during traffic stops. These differences are crucial to understand as we both try to develop tools to analyze interactions captured through bodyworn video and as we try to understand what quality policing would look like and consider policy reforms to improve interaction between police and the community.